I’ve had it up to here with the news cycle. Up to here. Part of it is just hilarious, all the ridiculous things famous people are doing, and then the funny things entertainers say about those ridiculous things. But mostly we’re laughing through clenched teeth.
A friend was over the other day telling me about her Bible study lesson, and how she was learning that the devil divides, and distracts. She was talking about her real life, and how division and distraction keeps her from the work she needs to do and the people she loves. But I couldn’t help hearing her lesson for the nation.
What divides? What distracts? … Well, shoot. In this time, in this era…what doesn’t?
Here’s a bit of why I don’t talk ever politics, ever, on my YouTube channel, and almost never anywhere else. (And don’t think I’ve been that way all my life, because I haven’t. Scroll back just a little ways in this public life…) But I don’t talk politics in my open forums anymore, because one day I realized that when I do I am almost always speaking out of my wounds. And the sounds of anger and fear are magnets that attract more of themselves.
Do I think it’s wrong to have strong feelings? Strong opinions? Of course not. Do I think it’s wrong to have gushing pain? Of course not. Do I think it’s wrong to open your mouth? NO.
But so many times in my life I have been trying to be a prophet, trying to open people’s eyes to the distance between where we are and where we ought to be. And again, I’m not saying God’s people never do that work, or never need to do that work. We can’t close that door. But so many times I was trying to be a prophet and really what I needed was more healing. I was just shouting into the air, sitting across from someone else who is trying to do the same thing, and we’re missing each other completely.
Meanwhile neither of us is doing our work, of caring and compassion and ordinary, real life.
Distraction. And division.
I’m not saying that God never needs a prophet. But I’m not always that kind of prophet. Sometimes I just think I am. And I know for a fact that I have hurt people with my shouting.
I think that there are ways to talk politics that lead to healing instead of division. And certainly there are ways to talk about issues (which actually are usually people) that lead to healing instead of division. But most of these ways are not available on Facebook or on YouTube. Most of these ways are a lot about listening and respecting. Most of these ways are about breaking the threads between our wounds and someone else’s power.
…which is beautiful, powerful work. It’s redemption work. Sometimes I call it “compassion rising,”
If I could lead a movement, it wouldn’t be towards anybody’s platform. Not anybody’s, not even mine. It would be toward healthy, ordinary life. It would be toward self-care in a radical, transformative model. It would be about shutting off the steady stream of poison that is our media and trying to replace it instead with the still, small voice…and the sound of wind and rain…and the sound of our precious, fragile beating hearts.
Our hearts are so capable of caring for one another. They are so capable of love.
If I could lead a movement, it would be about evading distraction, and healing divisions. It would be about each one of us gently and relentlessly doing the work — moment by moment — to be the people God knows that we can be. It would be about listening more than speaking, and it would be about making our hearts so strong and so wise that we are capable of listening well without lashing back.
There is so much horror in the world right now. I can’t do it justice with any kind of speeches. Our electronics that we buy and use are connected to a horrible legacy of war over conflict minerals. Our schools that we send our children to (if that’s what we have to do) are a racquetball getting tossed in a game of policy and power and corporate money. Our prisons are full and especially full of black and brown people and it’s completely heartbreaking. Our children all over the world are in danger, vulnerable to evils of all kinds.
No wonder we’re shouting.
But how do we become agents for healing? Is it the shouting? Or is it by breaking the lines between our wounds and someone else’s power? There are so many ways by which we seek for dignity through power and they’re not the same thing.
I think this work starts very close. I think it starts with making the moments of my day filled with things I’m not ashamed of. I think it starts with this one heart, turning toward the still, small voice and interacting authentically, as best I can…and living with my heart open. I think it starts with radical self-care — by which I mean believing that our hearts and bodies and souls are worth saving, and it IS possible to spring the trap. I think it starts by trying to protect myself from the poison of fear and anger while not protecting myself from the truth.
The truth is there is heartbreaking crisis almost everywhere you look. And still, the angels always start by saying, “Fear not.”
“Fear not…”
Then, after that, they give all their instructions.
And then, after that…sometimes…people do amazing things.
Wishing you all some peace today, even in a world where that is very hard to find. Wishing you the courage to heal…and hope enough to believe that anger and fear are not our only options.
Love, from the yurt.
Esther
Excellent blog. One that has been on my mind most of my adult life. Some people think that they have to change the opinion of others — now, and will brow beat them. Mending, healing, removing distractions in my humble opinion is that change or growth in a person is like gardening.
When I read in the bible that some of the seed is spread on rocky non fertile soil, but other falls on rich soil. But that in only planting the seed, now others come along and listen and water or week the ground around the seed. Be kind and don’t tell the person what to do, but give them a possible path to take. Walk with them for a while but don’t lead, walk side by side.
You never know who will be the one that says the correct word that touches a persons heart, some times we are the water, some times we are the weeder, some times we are the harvester.
Fear Not, for God the Father is in control
Be love, show love, and love will find a way into the hardened heart and bring healing, or truth, compassion, or guidance.
God Bless
I will be reading this again. And maybe again. And agaij when i forget. Thank you for the healing focus and words that encourage personal integrity when everything else is loud and out of focus. It is just what I needed today, Esther.
Thank you for this. It resonates. After my own few years of trying to be a prophet on social media, I quit a few months ago, realizing that it’s not going to change anyone’s mind. Your post put words to it for me – I was speaking out of my own wounds that needed more healing. Onwards with courage and compassion….
Thank you for being a prophet of compassion rising, Esther.
WOW!!!!
What a powerful post and so true. I felt like you were speaking to me personally.
Lately I have been fighting and inner struggle, my heart wants to simplify my life, as to enjoy it more. But in my “professional” life, where I work in academia land I feel pressured to pursue more education, bigger opportunities, more pay, etc.
While I can see the value that the world places on such things, that is not what my heart wants.
In my heart all I see is all the amazing time with my wife and kids, family, friends and pursuing things that actually make me happy, and I see this senseless pursuit of more education, more money, or a bigger title just takes away time and energy I would otherwise have for the things I listed above.
Thank you for the resounding message of clarity.
God Bless,
Kevin
Beautiful. I’m saving this to read again.
Why did I cry when I got to ‘fear not’? I think that was a God-thing. Ack. Thank you.
“If I could lead a movement, it would be about evading distraction, and healing divisions. It would be about each one of us gently and relentlessly doing the work — moment by moment — to be the people God knows that we can be” – I think maybe you are already doing this, friend.
love.
Thank you for these amazing and important words. I hardly know where to start, but i’m right with you.
Love this so much, Esther!
Mary, Erika’s mom
Thank you Ester. I needed this today.
I love you and your family for choosing a courageous life and for being a living example of what peace and stillness can look like in action.
Scott Robinson
Hollister, Ca.
Great post! But… you do talk politics in every blog post, and in every video. Just choosing the path that you have is in itself a political statement. Maybe you didn’t intend it to be, but it can definitely be interpreted that way. I don’t think that’s necessarily a bad thing: for those of us who homestead because we are frustrated and/or horrified by what we see some of the rest of the world doing, your lifestyle is an inspiration. What could be more political than taking control of your housing, your food, and your childrens’ education? And then building a community that is based on your values, not those dictated by the municipality in which you live, or the company you work for?
I understand that shouting about what’s wrong with the world is probably not an effective way to reach healthy goals, but this is particularly difficult when it forms the standard narrative of “justifying” the homesteader lifestyle (when we’re required to “defend” it). Give yourself a break! Being thoughtful, and taking the time to work through issues is enough in a time ruled by knee-jerk reactions and split-second judgment 🙂
I have enjoyed your videos and picked up that you were religiously inclined. So I have checked out your blog. Your comment about not talking about politics I.e
“almost always speaking out of my wounds. And the sounds of anger and fear are magnets that attract more of themselves”
Has really resonated with me, thank you so much for this it has given another perspective. All the best to you and your family .
Regards David
You are blessed and you’re blessing my life with your beautiful spirit. I must confess I have read this piece over and over. I just might do it again! Blessings to you and your family,